Workplace Conflict Can Be Your Friend, Not Your Foe.

When we ask our coaching clients what their favorite management duty is not one has ever said managing conflict. Go figure? Yet, conflict is an inevitable part of workplace relationships. The temptation is to ignore it in hopes that it will resolve itself. After all, people get defensive. Emotions get in the way. It’s not productive … or fun. But should you avoid it at all costs? Absolutely not. 

There are real consequences to no conflict, most notably the risk of groupthink, a lack of creativity, artificial harmony and low employee engagement. All of which can stagnate or even permanently sabotage the productivity and performance of a team.   

Likewise, there can be clear benefits to conflict if it’s healthy conflict. Conflict in and of itself does not have to be negative. But to move conflict from destructive to productive requires trust, transparency, and a full commitment to behaviors that fuel constructive conflict. 

How each of us responds to conflict is completely within our control. The automatic thoughts that pop into our head at the point of conflict and trigger negative behavior, such as “you have no idea what you’re talking about,” “I don’t have time for this,” or “how dare you challenge me,”  can be reframed to produce a more positive outcome. 

Next time someone pushes your buttons, take 10 seconds (while you also take a deep breath and step away from the emotion), stop and ask yourself – Am I overreacting? Could there be another way I could look at this? Yes, this takes practice and self-control but is certainly worth the effort when you consider the upside of healthy conflict. If you practice it enough, soon it will simply be how you naturally react.

Here are four reasons why conflict is good for the progress and growth of your team, department and organization:

• Conflict Promotes Open Mindedness and Allows People to be Heard. This fosters employee engagement and forces people to really listen. That’s the key – truly listening. When you listen, you learn and gain insights, which opens your mind to new perspectives and thinking.
• Conflict Strengthens Relationships and Bolsters Understanding. Mutual understanding fuels respect, which opens the door to empathy, which in turn builds rapport. All necessary ingredients to strengthen relationships, and when you’re in relationship with someone, it’s so much easier to find a beneficial resolution. 
• Conflict Fuels Breakthrough Ideas and Innovation. Working through conflict pushes people to go further in their thinking, to build on the viewpoints of others, and generate bigger and better ideas that might never have been considered. 
• Conflict Challenges the Status Quo and Accelerates Growth. In today’s competitive marketplace, where technological advances drive success, those companies that don’t have a growth mindset and are content with the status quo run a huge risk of obsolescence. Think Blockbuster or Radio Shack.

So, bring on the conflict. Invest the time in yourself and your people to develop productive conflict practices and behaviors that boost the right kind of conflict and accelerates growth. Most importantly, as a leader, you must model this behavior. And always remember … Leadership Matters!